Ask Shallon: How To Be Less Shy!



Feel awkward and anxious when you’re at a party, in a group or talking to boys? Here’s how to get over being shy and break out! Pro tip: literally no one cares …

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21 Comments

  1. Omg Shallon I love u so much 😘 Because of this video I really enjoyed my year in school and made more friends then I have ever had. I don't think I would have changed from shy to confident without this video. Thank u so much 😘😘😘😘😘😍😭

  2. You literally have no hateful comments. The reason why is because you're so confident.

  3. LOVE YOUR HAIR SHALLON!!!

  4. My friend has a boyfriend and they're both too embarrassed to talk to each other. What can she do and can I do anything to make things less awkward between them.

  5. I don't have a boyfriend but I feel I like more than one guy is that bad and what do I do? Thanks

  6. Shallon i can't tell you how much I adore you. I literally am starting to take notes on EVERY video. I'll read them every night and then get them implemented in my brain. Ill update you when I have more, but here are some :DApologizing
    Acknowledge their feelings… understand their point of view.Ex. You steal someone's boyfriend when you have your own say something like “Hey I took a few days to think about this, and I was just thinking. If I were in your shoes, in that situation, I would have felt so badly and really hated myself. I really understand. I’m so sorry that I was the person that made YOU feel those things.”After this, give a plan for WHY it won’t happen again.Ex. (building off of other one) “Look, I know you're still mad, and again I completely understand. But I found out a way to solve it. If you never bring your boyfriends around, I think we can still be friends, but you know me. I always get a bit rowdy with guys even if I don’t like them.”If they still don’t accept it (since it’s like a gift; they can accept it, or reject it) they’re just trying to hold it over your head and torture you with it.When that happens, say “You know what, I don’t understand why you keep torturing me with this. I’ve said everything I had to say, and apologized more than enough times, acknowledged what I’ve done, and how I’ll make it change, and I’m not gonna have it anymore. That’s in the past, and there’s nothing I can do about it. So just don’t bring that up anymore, ok?
    Being the life of the party
    Fake it till you make itPosturePsychologically changes your thought processRoll shoulders backPuts body in alignmentKnow your body is in alignment when thumbs are facing forward.When brushing your thighs, they aren’tLift your chin up an inch higher than usualTalk to as many people as you canNot for very long, but ask questionsLet them talk more than you.Come up with excuses… ex. “Oh one sec. Gotta make this quick phone call. Want anything from the bar? Yeah. I’ll be right back”Wear something comfortableSomething you feel like makes you look goodPut your phone down!You look so lamePeople won’t approach you w/ phone in hand, but with book they will. Not saying bring a book :/Don’t complainMakes you look like a bitchNobody wants to talk to someone like thatBe a positive person, even if you don’t like it.Come in preparedKnow two tidbits (or like 10 8)) that you want to tell people… whether it’s something you need to tell your friends or something you read earlier. KNOW IT SISTER.Also, be animated, and happy while doing so.Attracts people around you too. They’re like “Oh! She looks like she’s having such a good time! I want to talk to her!NEVER STAY TOO LONGYou never never never never EVER want to be the last person at ANY given event! Even if it’s the most fun even ever! Better to be the best you can be for 30 minutes than to bitch about it for 3 hoursLeave people wanting more.Tinder / Dating sites
    PictureHotHave someone take a picture of you full body (or record a vid and screenshot)Nice backdropShouldn’t not look like you4 pics is itNot crazyShort and sweet bioGreat headline ex. SingerGuitaristAlways be positive
    Things guys hate on social media
    1. NegativityOnly the good stuff (commercials)2. Too many selfiesDiversifyShow different sides of youDon’t post things like “I’m bored” shows you’re boredLook like you’re in love with your life.Like a magnet3. Weird obsessions with celebsKeep it to yourself gurl.. Nobody likes that shit4. OverpostingPost a lot less
    Be less shy
    Nobody cares about YOUOnly think about themselvesDon’t be known for what you lackStart small (people you feel comfortable with) slowly bring other people in1 new friend every two monthsSign up for different things

  7. shallon, so there is this guy I like but he lives in another state and the only time we really see each other is every year at camp and after camp I usually spend a week at his house then go back home. And I'm pretty sure he likes me too but I'm getting ready to go to camp next week. What should I do? Should I do a long distance relationship if he's interested, and if so how do I keep him interested and keep him thinking about me?

  8. My crush asked me who I like and I followed your old video.I don't know if this helps but he's my best friend's brother and my friend.I then asked him who HE likes. He replied with: There's this girl but people say she's too old for me and I replied with: same but not a girl.But this wasn't about me. He's a grade older than me and told me he likes an older girl..I know you probobaly won't respond but I really need your help thank you so much!

  9. but…ppl DO judge, and they do laugh at other ppl and they do talk behind your back …so what about that?
    and how would you recommend shy ppl to make friends if they are already out of highschool? you can be surrounded with people, and still not be able to initiate friendships. if you could do a video on how to initiate friendships (without looking awkward…) that would be really nice… thanks in advance

  10. Hey Shallon, I am really stuck and don't know what to do. I have had a crush on this guy for a while now and I think he knows I do but every time he comes to talk to me I choke up. like we talk on the phone and I'm fine but once we're face to face, he'll come talk to me and I just choke up and the convo doesn't last long. now I've asked myself, why do I do that? and I think I'm afraid of rejection or getting my heart broken again. please help me. what do I do?

  11. Shallon whats your snapchat code?

  12. Is she dating michael?

  13. Hey Shallon, So I have been volunteering the past week at a little kids church camp and I work with the kids in pre-school. There is this really shy guy that works with me and we have been flirting a lot. I like him and I can tell he likes me, but I don't know what I should do. On our lunch break it's usually just us and we really get to know each other. Ik the guy is supposed to come to us but I feel the urge to do something.

  14. I just find being "social" so exhausting! When I go to a party or other event where I have to make small talk, I come home and crash and need about 12 hours of sleep.

  15. Hey Shallon, I sent you a message here on youtube, it's an emergency. Please reply soon 🙂

  16. Please do a video on how to be photogenic! I joined a professional fraternity, so I get photos taken of me often. I am so bad at smiling and posing, especially when I only have one shot.

  17. What should you do if your being cocked blocked from a guy

  18. can you make a vid on "can a guy and a girl just be friends"?

    'cause I don't get it. why would a guy who I don't know suddenly chat or talk to me?? does that mean he likes me?? I don't believe guys and girls can be just friends unless they ain't straight.
    as in really close friends.

  19. Hey Shallon, I hope you're doing well!
    I was wondering… This guy and I (we're technically not in a relationship because of distance) ALWAYS talk about getting married in the future and having kids, etc. Is this good or bad, considering the fact that we aren't in a relationship? I can tell he actually wants to, and I do too, but I get a weird feeling that talking about it at this stage isn't good…

  20. Sometimes i'm shy because I never know what to say when i'm around new people or if im in a new environment. I'm super sarcastic, and thats my way of putting myself out there, is by being funny. But unfortunately, some people are sensitive, or don't really understand my humor. So how can I go about talking to people and being more open in a lighter manner? & what should I say? because i'm only shy/quiet around people who aren't very "out there", and extremely outgoing with other outgoing people. So basically, how can I be outgoing with other shy people, especially in a new setting? I'm going to college in a few months and I want to be more out there and make awesome friends.

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